Suicide, Loss & Bargaining with God

Lately I have been considering my future as a counselor. I want to be a different kind; I want people to know that my way of living is not necessarily the right way, it is just the only way I know. And what I know is that there are exceptions to every rule. There are losses and wins. There are endings and new beginnings. There are deaths and birth's maybe even re-birth's. Life is what it is and I still don't know what it is but I don't have to and either do you. There is evil out there everywhere but don't give into it no matter how weak you're feeling. You'll meet people that just want to see you fail and those people may be in every corner you turn to. Remind yourself daily--who you are and do what you need to do. Figure out a way of life that works for you but know that if that way of life leads you astray; ask for help because someone else traveled the same road you are and they know how to get you back where you need to be. Don't get discouraged if you try and don't succeed--that is when you need to try something else. From what I know of life so far--it is all trial and error. We have to make the mistake first before we could learn anything. I don't know about you but my mistakes partially created me and I can't be sorry for that because who I am is fine with me. The only thing I regret is the countless days I've spent worrying about what people think; if I was skinny enough, smart enough, pretty enough, sporty enough, wise enough, "straight-looking" enough, religious enough, good enough as a daughter and a sister. Let me tell you where that got me; that got me the ability to allow life to pass me by without knowing it because I didn't accept myself. I didn't realize that *I* was the key to my own existence. I hadn't known that my happiness depended on how *I* looked at myself because I was too busy looking at others looking at me. My mistake was realizing that there is more to life than that. The good thing about being alive is--you have time. You have the time to teach and be taught. So teach. Be Taught. And most importantly; ask for help.